To The Only One I've Ever Loved

Dear Friends and Fans,

It was 11:37 pm, I was going to let Maryjane out for a pottie then paint my toe nails. I was looking forward to going to bed... I had to get some rest for a busy day at the guest posing. I live on a park which is down in a valley. I opened the back door and Maryjane took off after some deer. I started yelling her name to come back.... then I heard all this ruckus. I thought Maryjane was fighting with another dog. I could hear her screaming. I had slippers on so it was difficult to get through the woods and the creek with rocks. Maryjane stopped calling out to me, but I could hear the direction it was coming from. There was a mass of bushes and trees. I couldn't get to her and it was pitch black out. I went running home to get a flash light, cussing myself the whole time because I just thought to myself last week ago to get C batteries for that flashlight under the sink. What good is it if it doesn't work right?.....My neighbors were outside thank god because I would have gone crazy banging on doors to get me a flash light. I yelled I need a flashlight Maryjane needs help. I put on my shoes and they were quickly there with 2 lights. I grabbed one and went back to where I heard Maryjane. I went up the hill and shined my light down into the mass of trees...Maryjane was stuck down there. I could tell she couldn't move from the hips down. She ran off a 15 foot cliff. The ground just ended and there were large trees all around. It was very dark and I know she couldn't see. The guys were right behind me. I told them to be careful it looks like she broke her back. I gave my one neighbor the light and said for them to get her out I was going to call my vet. I ran home and called. I got the emergency number off the machine and told them we were coming in. I ran back outside and the guys were carrying Maryjane. I asked if she could walk and they said no. I got her into the back seat and took off. They took xrays and didn't find a break, but she obviously has a very bad neurological injury. I asked if they could keep her out of pain and see if she can get some improvement. On Sunday April 26, 2009, I had to put her down. She was my first dog. It took me a long time to feel comfortable enough to get a dog. I wanted to make sure I would be able to give a dog a good life. Maryjane actually found me. I picked her up in front of a grocery store the day before I left Georgia ( life University) to come to St. Louis for Logan Chiropractic. It was a big stepping stone in my life. I was moving farther away from home, going to a new state where I know no one, have no job, and a puppy sitting next to me. I always said I wanted my first dog to be a black standard poodle, and I'd name her Maryjane. Well a different Maryjane found me, and she was a perfect dog. Everyone loved Maryjane. She was the most loving dog. people were amazed that a pit bull was so nice. They would always say"it's the way they are raised". So I guess I did a good job. She was a very happy dog. I will miss her like you will never believe. She knew me so well. It's so ironic that I was just digging through some stuff the other day and ran across some puppy pix of Maryjane. I looked and reminisced. I was noticing how she had aged. I had her 7.5 years. I had a friend ask me the other day if I've ever been in love. I said "no", I don't think so. " I don't think so"? She said. I told her I compare it to the way I feel about Maryjane. When I would think of her my stomach would get butterflies, I couldn't wait for bed or nap time. She spooned with me. She would snore so loud I would have to wear ear plugs at times...LOL.. I like to hear her sleep. She would make funny noises as she chased squirrels in her dreams. She always wanted to be right under my arm. She would always watch me get ready. Follow me from room to room. She was like a little kid in the morning. I would come down and make my coffee, and she would lay in the bed for a bit longer, and then come crawling down and get on the couch so she could be close to me. I always wondered how the throw blankets on my couches got pulled down and sometimes the pillows on are on the floor. I never saw her actually do it. Several times a day I have to put the blankets back and pick up pillows from the floor. Then one day, I finally saw her do it. It was so cute (although it pissed me off at times). She reached up and put her paw on it and pulled it down. Then she kicked off a couple pillows, but kept one for her head. Very systematically she spread out the blanket and laid down with a big sigh. I finally saw her do it. So it wasn't a ghost after all....LOL.

Needless to say, I got 2 hours of sleep. I had to be at the pre judging by 8:30 am. I packed most of my stuff up Friday night, so I wasn't in too much of a rush on Saturday. I had to totally shut off my emotions. It was difficult, but I managed. I did still have an obligation to have my booth up and to pose in the evening. I was hoping I could pull this off. I couldn't let everyone down that was expecting me to be there. I didn't want to mess up the routine or get emotional or brain dumb when in front of the mic. God took it easy on me for the rest of the weekend. Everything went well at the show. My booth was fun. My posse had a great time and help me immensely. My photographer was all over it and will have some great pix out soon. My routine was on, my impromptu speech came out smoothly and purpose full ,hopefully.

I looked better than ever. I can see the changes that I wanted to make in the 7 weeks I had. I hope the judges will also. I had a lot of compliments on my physique, and this is from local people that have seem me evolve. I appreciate you all.

2 weeks out of the NY Pro Show, I just have to bring it in a bit tighter. It seemed like I had everything down. I used http://www.speciesnutriton.com/ new aqualyze. It worked great! I stayed nice and full. It was fairly comfortable. I'm a baby with the dehydration part. I complain about that the whole time. It wasn't killing me this time though. I think it was the aqualyze. I'm gonna kill myself with fish and broccoli for the next 2 weeks. I'm going to change my workouts to 4 all body work out days. Now it's about stimulating those deep fibers to fill out the bellies and press the muscle against my skin. Lots of posing!!!!

Thank you for your support, and to all the new fans I meet over the weekend. I appreciate you all. I will have a NPC Midwest gallery in the free section of site for fans and competitors to view, and Dr. Sexy galleries. You can check out the shows website to http://www.npcmidwest.com/ .

MARYJANE May You rest In Peace. Mommy misses you already.

Your Pro,

Dr. Dena